I entered my workplace at around 4 pm. I knew it was IT. IT as in my first breakthrough performance to see the other side of the night right throughout the entire time. There have been prior occasions when I have seen the sun rise from the dark and even times when I have just sat in my room and witnessed the night take a descent. But most of those times were under heavy influence of alcohol (read vodka), Pink Floyd and a fair amount of mad engineers going gaga over either the hottie in the circuit or even discussing career plans at length. And trust me, alcohol helps. (I am in no way promoting alcoholism, it’s just that it has had a deep influence in letting my expressions ventilate more smoothly). And here was I. Staring at the cubicles painted in white and sky blue with tubes glowing above the desks. The AC must be set at almost 18 degrees and the walk to my seat was through the long corridor where I take left after the second sectioned opening. The long corridor led to the Toilet, and to the left of it was the Pantry. Nobody dared to ask what was at the right of the end of the corridor. What was troubling me more than anything else was the sheer magnitude of the number of hours I had to spend until I was to be set FREE. Yes, it was a sort of a prison for me, and I had no companions to console me- no alcohol, no Pink Floyd. Yes, the Engineers are here also, but in no way am I discussing my career plans with them. So how do I resist all of this? CAFFEINE!! Read the rest of this post »

Every morning I wake up to see what was Yesterday.
Is this what life is meant to be?
To make my cup of coffee,sip it while I learn what I say,
Is my reward only my fee?

To walk through that door and see the faces of the bots,
As we were brought here in bunches and lots,
The mistakes I make , counted in colons and dots
Is this all in my life that I got?

Where is the me in I?
Is it alive or left to die?
Where is the me in I?
The wings are cut and I try to fly.
Where is the me in I?
Is it alive or left to die?
Where is the me in I?
Oh I better kiss my past Goodbye!!!

Amen!

Pic Courtesy: Cyril BRETON

This might come across as an offensive piece of writing directly aimed at toilet humor. But well, literally speaking it is more aimed at the toilet bit of it. Let’s call it the toilet etiquette or perhaps “Loo-tiquette”. This is directly aimed at that loo-natic guy peeing next to me even when the entire row is empty. I really do not get it. Why next to me? Yes, I am claustrophobic. And add to that, I have stage fright!! Now, you might ask how does that relate to my problem.Yes, I am a weird guy. I cannot pee in the presence of a crowd. I need proper silence, concentration and direction in that order. And no, I cannot multi-task while I am doing it. And so, I’d rather not see you too doing the same. Which leads to rule no.1 of “Loo-tiquette”

Rule 1: No Phone Calls

If you have come to take a leak, just do it. Do NOT attend a call, or try to negotiate your crucial deals while your have your phone held between your ears and your left shoulder, whereas your body is releasing . Think of the person on the other end who hears a flush when the deal is done. And also think of what value you hold of the deal. Was it that important that you needed to “Flush IT”? Stop trying to remember things on the call while you are peeing and please oh please, make sure your ringtones do not belong to the Disco era!!

Corollary to Rule no.1: No involving in the call Read the rest of this post »